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Who am I ?

Everyday, we read numerous posts of so many different people in situations, that bring unhappiness and many of these are circumstantial. At a high level, it does appear that life is challenging and stressful at many levels. There are so many stressors - job, kids, in laws etc . In most situation's it is imperative that one sees a therapist to seek guidance .  One of the most important parts of when we are dealing with issues - Where do we stand in this journey?  In a lot of ways the key part of solving this problem of issues around us - is how well do we know ourselves ? How much self acceptance do we give ourselves - appearance or situations . Do we acknowledge or accept the situation as it is ? The journey starts with oneself . Before we know about other's around us . And the fact remains we will never be able to fully know someone, even in a life time . Parents,partners, siblings, children are human beings and they are bound to make shifts , changes in their behaviour . But...
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Does this serve you ?

Do you find yourself feeling helpless ? Is the world against you and you are fighting a constant battle.? Do you feel that others are responsible for situations that have led to you to a point in life ? Do you compare yourself to others and feel disappointed about life ?  Chances are that you may gone through a traumatic experience or a series of experiences and perhaps need healing or help to fight these inner demons . The possibility of being in the victim mindset may blur the brigther side and seeing things for as they are . Are you taking responsibility or accountability for your actions or do you find the constant need to blame a partner, a family member, a parent or a sibling perhaps. ? The victim mindset as it is called is not only draining for the person but a form of exhaustion for everyone around . To a point everyone feels helpless . If you had to take a step back and probably look at specific situations with a broader lens or be aware of the growth mindset,...

The power of choice

Did we have a choice then ? Maybe not. Some of the events in our life are not a choice . They have happened and cannot be undone . Choice is a powerful tool and we wake up to choices every day . Right from the moment we decide what time to wake and probably most of our day And so the we may choose to dwell in a place of discomfort or we may choose to look not to spend our time and mental energy on something we cannot do anything about.  The only thing we can do something about is make a choices. Our choices may be good and bad and for those we must take accountability. Everyday we may difficult choices , but can we try to make a choice. Can we choose joy over sadness? Can we choose compassion over anger ?  Can we choose kindness over hate ? Can we choose forgiveness ? Can we choose to love than to resent ? Can we choose living in the moment? Can we choose the power of our breath ? So we do have the power how to feel about a certain situation.  Some of our choices are only...

#sharetheload

I was watching some news shows on women's day today and I came across #sharetheload campaign. It is obviously something that is hard to drill down a man's head that they should be sharing household chores. Most Indian men to my knowledge wouldn't. Some very woke men are pro sharing chores like washing the dishes, folding a laundry etc . The social conditioning on gender based roles is so deep rooted in our system is that it is almost equivalent to a generational curse. This is something that men are pre-conditioned with . A lot of this can be attributed to the upbringing and the social construct . I have come across the most modern men, who think it's not for them to do chores.  Many women are lucky if they have partners who do share the load. In a traditional set up may be it was because "the man" was said to be the breadwinner and he would come back after a hard days work . But the fact that being a homemaker is a full time job, is often neglected. Roles ha...

You are okay !

You are okay !  You will be okay !  Maybe the outcome is not what makes you feel okay . Maybe the expectations of the outcome were different. Things don't always work out the way we want them to. But it is a fleeting moment or everything we have around us is momentary . Clichéd  but true - Change is the only constant . This overwhelming feeling with change too . You are okay and maybe you have to realign and adjust when things dont according to plan . You are okay and you will be okay . You will always be okay . This situation is temporary.  Acceptance of what it is .  You may not be in a life situation that you wanted to be , but you are okay . It is disappointing and it is hard , but it will pass . You have your flaws and you are perfect. Perfect in the eyes of many , maybe you dont see it now . But you will.  Self acceptance is what you can do for yourself. Self acceptance outside of the judgements .The judgements of yourself and others . For...

Intent v/s resolutions

The beginning of the year  calls upon reflections of the last year. Most often than not the amazing parts or sometimes the not-so-good parts. Each of us has our own share of ecstatic moments or sometimes completely the opposite. Some years bring us joy and some sadness and sometimes it's a mixed bag of emotions. Wherever we are we end up thinking about what we doing last year at this time. New year resolutions are pass é. What we really need are intentions and practice these intentions consciously and with mindfulness. How do we move forward and bring peace and calmness into our lives? What are the constant reminders we need? Let us remind ourselves that wherever we stand in life, we have one tiny thing to be thankful or grateful for however challenging situations may be. Let's find that one thing and embrace gratitude. Let's embrace kindness in our hearts - first towards ourselves and spread whatever we can to everyone around us. Lets us practice loving kindness with the d...

Travel in these times.

Everyone who knows me, also knows how paranoid I was about travelling back home and taking an air plane. I knew this wasn't going to be for someone who has some level of anxiety already. My paranoia got me to take the first seat on the plane by the window. I made sure I was wearing a mask and a shield and I assumed that fellow travellers were being careful too. The whole piece of travelling is about being careful, I guess. But I realised that my countrymen didn't think of it that way. First things first, you need to check-in before your flight. When  entering into the airport you have to pull down your mask to match your face with your ID. The BSF guys are in a glass cabin.  But that is where you realise, that there is absolutely NO social distancing.  The airport authorities and airline staff have taken the effort of placing yellow markers all over the place. But I am assuming everyone is colour blind. This is THE most simple instruction - Maintain distance. It beats me ...