Throughout our lives we are expected to do things for each other, even it is something we wouldn't like to do. Pressing the no button becomes difficult, almost impossible.
As kids - our relationship with our parents is one of co-dependency unless circumstances decide otherwise. Our parents are equally dependent and thus starts the cycle of expectations and living up to people's expectations. We grow up do to these things for our friends, partners, children, in-laws, and so on.
Why - because this is the way it is supposed to be? Almost like a generational curse. We end up becoming a similar kind of parent, not letting children get out of our clasp. Whether we like it or not, we are already in the trap. This whole process can be very exhausting for us and our relationships. In the scheme of things, we forget about ourselves, our needs, our dreams. It is almost like quicksand that cannot come out of it.
Some of us learn the hard way and able to make a clear distinction of putting ourselves, albeit with a lot of guilt. There is a new label that we get associated with - Selfish. Selfish because we want to travel alone, do things alone without any company or maybe walk to a coffee shop or have a drink ...
But the good part over a period of time, this new you starts to grow on people.
The path to this self-care is long and awry. But we have to draw our lines to find ourselves. We need to find a space that makes us completely and truly full by ourselves. Invest in ourselves spiritually, emotionally, and tirelessly. We need to focus on ourselves first so that we can spread our love and light to others around us.
And this is completely doable because nobody is indispensable.
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